In one of my English classes (First Certificate) we were discussing the benefits of using computer games as educational tools. Some sort of expert said taht games help in mind’s development in plenty of ways. For example, games like Klonoa and Digimon World II helped me a lot when it comes to English and logic. They are both complex, strategic games, which certainly makes the gamer think, relate facts, use a primitive scientific method to figure things out.
On the other hand, those games were not supposed to teach me anything concerning the language. Even though I was always interested in English, those “dialogs” inside the game improved my vocabulary, but I guess their duty was to get me used to English, to improve my relationship with the language.
Then I thought: what about math? Perhaps those games which involved a little math effort (Digimon II had the “digivolution” system which was quite annoying mathematically speaking) made a point when it comes to make children get used to numbers, memorize some operation patterns, make their ‘math reasoning’ faster.
They won’t learn how to do logarithms, but it is a start, you see…
P.S.: I guess this applies to all common school subjects. I don’t know exactly why I focused on Math. Hmmm whatever…
Wow! Hi there again, long time I don’t see you. This long time is explained by the fact that I’m quite busy with other things, as always, and translating the article I was trying to translate turned out to be a little more harder than I’d expected it to be. Then, I decided to stop trying to translate things. Enough of the past. From now on everything posted here will be original content. Not even a parallel in portuguese - only references, perhaps =D.
Well, I don’t know much about how much will this “everything” be. But please, be patient. “The thing goes out” - a literal translation to a very used brazillian expression =P, which means “this is gonna get done soon” or something like that.
The Toymaker
This is an old article I wrote, I changed a couple of things in it. It is about reading the Black Iron Prison for the first time, and what it means to me.
So. I’m sitting here, as I always do these days, stewing in my own juices. Smoking cigarettes, drinking all the alcohol in the house, yes even the girly ones. I think a bit, maybe that should be ‘regret’ a bit, about the last couple years, then the last decade. “Hell,” I say “why not my whole damn life!”
People I’ve known, and let down, or who let me down. Opportunities wasted. T.V. shows I missed.
The last six months in fact, I haven’t even DONE anything. Except run away, retreating into an ever tighter corner. At times its easy to make myself believe that I achieved something by doing nothing. At times I can even make myself believe that continuing to do nothing about it is a “Good Thing”.
I owe things to people who can’t find me. Money, Goodbyes, Explanations.
Political ideologies, religious mantras, ‘common sense’… Hah! I used to think I was clever, I used to think I was smart, but I really am no more than a cabbage.
No, worse, I’m a toy.
A clockwork one wound up by my own hand, to amuse others. To glimpse my reflection in the McBurgerHut window and amuse myself with my stupid weirdness. And every day, with my first cigarette, and putting on my glasses, just before I go for a piss, I wind up the spring again.
See him roll around and stumble!
It says no user servicable parts in raised letters, next to the poorly manufactured tin key on my back. But maybe thats a lie. Maybe the user CAN change himself.
So one day, I stumble onto a website, well off my beaten track of boring, predictable subjects. I read a funny little book written by a couple of weed smokers. I find it amusing, given that as a semi-ex stoner , I always have a weakness for people who write shit when they’re out of their faces. O.K. That was fun.
I follow the Google trail to a disturbing little forum, well removed from the comfortable, predictable little holes I usually find myself in. This place is seriously strange. Bizzarre names and avatars, and scary posts. I read another little book, not so funny, inviting me to a jailbreak.
O.K. the toy has been busted out of its package now. I just need to find a way out of the toy. Hold your breath man, because this is really going to hurt…
~Payne
The discordian calendar is focused on the big movement of time - he changes the structure of months and weeks. Five months, 73 days each, 5 days in a week, with funny names based on the 5 basic elements… 10 holidays, 11 every fourth year…
However, we keep on using the same time system upon small things, such as hours, minutes, seconds… A day has 24 hours, an hour has 60 minutes, every minute has 60 seconds… What if we changed that? Santaum, a recent discordian (santaum.org [link in portuguese]) suggested a 10-based time system [link in portuguese]. The day would have 10 hours, one hour would have 100 minutes, and a minute’d have 100 seconds! The second would be a little different from the conventional one, but the difference isn’t big. 10 x 100 x 100: we’ve got 100.000 seconds in a day.
This could emerge interesting questions: why not? After all, is a challenge: the summerians used the 60-based time system, and to get ourselves used to a new way of counting time requires some effort. Hihicroned* discordianism is about exploding minds, isn’ it? Expanding them to get over the modern prisons they’ve become. What more could you expect?
Besides that, it would be a perfect mindfuck, wouldn’ it? It’s freaky enough when you tell people today is 3174 Chaos 51, it would be even spookier if they asked for the time and we answered: 5:70!!!
Discordian Calendar Howto
The mechanics os the calendar can be confusing, So I’ll try and explain it in the easiest way possible: what you do is to turn 86400 (24*3600) seconds of a day into 100000 seconds. Everything from now is only a question of simple mathematical logics or normalization: If you wanted to know, for examplo, which saint-discordian time is for conventional 15:30 (3:30 P.M.), you just follow the math:
15:30 is equal to 55800 seconds
So 86400 is to 100000 as 55800 is to…
Putting in the paper, it would be like this:
86400 100000
58000 x
You multiply it like an x, and then you have:
100000*55800 = 86400x
Which is equal to…
5580000000 = 86400x
You take 86400 to the other side, so you can isolate the x…
5580000000 / 86400 = x
And the result of the division is…
64583 = x
6 hours
45 minutes
83 seconds
Or, if you prefer normalization, it’s even simplier.
15:30 is equal to 55800 seconds.
Multiply 55800 by the number of normalization, which is 1,15741
The result is just the same, 64583.
Saint-discordian calendar: conversion table
Conventional time - Saint-discordian time
Hour:minute - Hour:minute
00:00 - 00:00
01:00 - 0:41
02:00 - 0:83
03:00 - 1:24
04:00 - 1:66
05:00 - 2:08
06:00 - 2:50
07:00 - 2:91
08:00 - 3:33
09:00 - 3:75
10:00 - 4:16
11:00 - 4:58
12:00 - 5:00
13:00 - 5:41
14:00 - 5:83
15:00 - 6:25
16:00 - 6:66:66*
17:00 - 7:08
18:00 - 7:50
19:00 - 7:91
20:00 - 8:33
21:00 - 8:75
22:00 - 9:16
23:00 - 9:58
24:00 - 10:00
* Unexpectedly, 4 o’clock in the afternoon would be a terrible number for Christians at the saint-discordian time, once it would be exactly 6 hours, 66 minutes and 66 seconds. And, guess it: 4 o’clock is exactly 2/3 of the day. Ha! I didn’t expect that.
Saint-discordian time - Conventional time
Hour:minute - Hour:minute
0:00 - 00:00
1:00 - 02:23
2:00 - 04:47
3:00 - 07:12
4:00 - 09:35
5:00 - 12:00
6:00 - 14:24
7:00 - 16:48
8:00 - 19:11
9:00 - 21:36
10:00 - 24:00
To make it easier, I’ve seen in the table that, for each conventional hour you can add 41 or 42 minutes to saint-discordian times (1:00, 0:41 - 2:00, 0:83). Well, since 42 appears more than 41, we could normalize it: to know which discordian time is for a conventional time, multiply the number of hours by 42. If it were 7 A.M., for example, the result of the multiplication’d be 294 - 2 hours and 94 minutes. There will be some erros because, as it was said before, sometimes we add 41, not 42, but in general the number gets very close.
In an inverted sense, at the second table, you add 2 common hours and 24 normal minutes for each saint-discordian hour, which makes everything easier.
Conclusion
With the whole world using the common calendar, the big and the small one, we can’t simply ignore it, because of a pratical issue. However, just as 1001 gatos [link in portuguese] already applies the discordian calendar in the blog, little actions that aim to adopt, here and there, this new system, would be interesting. They would be good mindfucks and, who knows, something more to add to something they can call in the future “discordian culture”, just as the moon calendar makes part of the Mayan culture.
In the discordian calendar 5 o’clock is the middle of the day; 42 is the easy conversion number and adding all the numbers from 1,15741 we get 19, and 19 is 1 + 9 which is 10 (number of hours in the day) and etc. 4 o’clock would be a terrible time for Christians. Adopt the new system NOW!
I’ve just downloaded and installed the OpenOffice.org suite 3 Beta in my Slackware 12.1 Linux and I’m here to write some of my impressions about it. Why? First, because I want to say what I thought. And thus, I intend to make the developers hear it later.
Compiling
My friend Tiago said few linuxers have ever compiled OpenOffice. Now I know why. It’s surely one of the most annoying things I’ve ever (almost) did in Linux. I know the software depends on a lot of things, and it couldn’t be different (if it can, please do something in that direction, developeeeerszz!).
But one thing they surely could do to help people out is: why can’t we get a NORMAL configure file inside the tarball’s main directory? And why can’t we use make instead of Dmake? Make it easier, please. These little details bore people.
Installing
So, after I gave up on compiling it I took the RPMs. The Java installer is very intuitive and cool (and the compiler can breathe after the source code’s hell) but there are some problems with it. It simply stucks when it tries to install some package called “mailmerge”, and if I unmark it from the installation menu, the process freezes at “onlineupdate”.
What I had to do? I converted all the rpms through the command rpm2tgz (rpm2tgz * inside /RPMS directory) and installed the new-born packages with installpkg (su -c installpkg *.tgz inside /RPMS).
The installation was soft but was annoying since I had to create links to open the apps by the command line. If you have to do it too, remember you have to create at least a link to the file soffice too. All the other ones depends on that in the directory to work.
(To create symbolic links, use the command ln -s. The syntax is ln -s [file you want to copy] [name of the target file])
Start Center
Ok, I need to say it… Is it just me or someone else finds Start Center something almost completely useless? I don’t use OpenOffice as OpenOffice; I use its Writer, Calc, Impress. When I want the Writer, I open it. Whenever I want Calc, I open it. I never used such a thing as a Start Center to open a document or open an application or whatever I wanted to do with OOo.
But that doesn’t have to be completely useless: what could be done is turn Start Center into some “New User Center”. Right after OOo is installed, the SC would appear (it would be like a Welcome Application). That Welcome App would show the user the different apps within OOo (Writer, Calc, Base, etc) and then some usefull hints and tips (Did you know you could have extensions and etc).
This new user guide would have to be very beautiful and fresh. Actually, I have another idea: Why don’t we have a single, independent application for Help? Instead of the look-like-other-apps-help-page help, we could have an useful, intuitive and beautiful application focused on help, with tips on how to use OOo in order to increase productivity.
It’s just an idea, but a good one, don’t you think? Even if not a new OOo Help Application, Start Center could be made somehow more useful.
Writer
Writer is an application I use a lot, the one I find more useful. I was really disappointed by it. Why? Because of some bad things in it? No. But because of the absence of good (better, rather) things.
First of all: Why are the buttons so small? After a ride in the options, I could change it to “large”. But then I just think it’s weird such small icons to be default. And, by the way, the look is just the same. Writer 2.4 and Writer 3.0 looks just THE SAME. And that really hurts.
A lot of people discuss about the Office 07 new look. I didn’t like it that much; but I must admit it’s modern, at least. Some people may find it intuitive and some may not; but it was definitely a good shot. This could be a GREAT time to head to another direction, to stop copying the same pattern and try something new, unexpected. I heard something about themes, just like Mozilla Firefox and Thunderbird. Know what? THAT would be the coolest thing EVER. Another idea? Try a vertical bar instead of a horizontal one. Why not?
A BUG: I just can’t do anything.. Backwards. If I write something, I just can’t press backspace and delete the letters. That’s not just annoying, it makes impossible to work upon it!!!!! Since this is a very obvious problem, probably it’s a known bug, but I’ll take a look at it later. Actually, I found out I just can’t move forward whenever I am in the middle of a word either.
Something else I didn’t like: When you click ‘Spellcheck’ (on a wrong word), a dialog opens. The dialog looks JUST LIKE MS OFFICE SPELLCHECK DIALOG!!! I know it works and then I’m being kind of irracional if it works, but is “outstanding but still useful dialog” too much to ask for???
I reeeally liked the display of multiple pages. I actually thought “Why couldn’t it be done before??”. Well, I am being kind of idiot, because if it wasn’t there before, then that must be not so easy to develop…
Idea: If i wanted to put notes on a text, I’d think I could do that by the context menu (for a selected word). Please, put something like “create note” in the menu, that would be fantastic!!!
New, fresh-looking icons… Everything is beautiful, but is it really different from what it was on 2.4??? I Don’t think so… Hum, what else… The language selector is very cool…
About notes: they should be more beautiful, I think. They are too square =S But, in the other hand, when you focus on the page, not in the note, it gets cool with the color effect. I liked that.
Calc
The second application from OOo I use most is Calc, named Excel in MS Office. I liked Calc a lot, I think the look of the sheet is really cool (the blue degrade at letters and numbers).
Another thing I liked is the Workbook Sharing. But I have a question: why only Calc??? If we could share works from all OOo aaplications, it would be AWESOME!!
I must say Calc is very cool. I haven’t used a lot yet to check for any simple bugs, but I can say is really, really cool. The only thing I could say about it is about the interface: the same Writer thing. It could be outstanding. I think it NEEDS to be outstanding. *drama on* the time is NOW *drama off*.
And, about the Solver and Chart Enhancements: they might be good, I don’t know. Haven’t tested them. I guess I don’t need them at all.
Impress
Impress is the least impressive of the three apps I freqüently use. The startup assistant is cool, although I don’t use it at all. But there’s something very annoying: there are A LOT of buttons AND item descriptions in menus missing in the interface. That is very bad =/
The Slide Transition is as bad as it was on 2.4: it’s slow and is irritating as it is. Animations are bad as well.
Crop is a cool feature, as it is shown at the features page. At least something good! I didn’t try the feature of using a scanner to bring a picture to a slide because my printer is not well configured yet in my slack, but I would like to try as soon as possible.
Quickness
The time I needed to open 2.4 Writer in Ubuntu using the quickstarter is almost the time used to open a 3 Writer. Which is good, very good. The applications are not slower, at least for the few things I have to do (I use no advanced features at all).
Conclusion
Calc is absolutely awesome for me because I need only to do simple things with it, so I found it great. Writer is good, but not very good. Impress is bleeding disappointing. The applications are as fast as they’re supposed to be, and the new features are interesting. The worst aspect is the interface. There’s a general feeling, at least for what I have seen in comments around the internet, that now is the time for changes. If even MS Office was succeed, I don’t know why couldn’t OOo innovate even more. Some bug fixing, promised enhancement applying, interface changing and everything’s going to be fine.
Impressions Overall
- Compiling should be a normal thing, like ./configure, make, make install. If possible, less dependencies (or at least some easy way to install them all at once). Apart from that, fixing the Java installer for this weird error on installation of “mailmerge” and “onlineupdate”.
- Start Center is useless. Make it a good Help/Tip/Welcome Application.
- The interface: change the look to support themes just like Firefox. Not only talking about buttons, but about structure. Try a lateral bar instead of a vertical one. Unusual, right? That could be just great, why not? Why is everything so stuck to the past? The spellcheck dialog, the look and feel of applications… Come on!!
- Writer; loved the multiple pages view. Is a good idea to put “create note” in the context menu of a selection, and notes should not be “squared”, although the color effect is cool. The Language selector is very nice.
- Calc is awesome. Workbook sharing should be available for ALL aplications.
- Impress is horrible. Menus are unusable because there are no icons or texts in a lot of buttons and animations / slide transitions are slow.
Oh hi! I didn’t see you there.
My name is Payne, and I have come to preach (my) The Word to you.
For me, it happened when I landed on my face after falling down some stairs. I don’t know how you found, or will find, your enlightenment, but let me tell you, nothing beats the feeling that it really isn’t worth it afterwards.
To find brothers in Discord, removed from the English speaking world is always a wondrous thing to me. It was a great and pleasant surprise to find that Reverend Peterson Cekamp had translated the Black Iron Prison texts into Português, and it is my wish that such exchanges are made more often.
Here in the U.K. I find that Discordianism is found everywhere, but is not called Discordianism. Often, it is called “real life” or “red tape” or other such annoyances. People here mindfuck themselves so regularly, that it is no challenge for those of us who are Discordian to do it for them. The fun is in watching them, laughing at them, and using the chaos to our advantage, to make our lives more comfortable.
I tell you, brothers, that the English speaking world is fucked.
It is my belief that the cultural noise, the inherent chaos of thousands of people shouting different orders to you at once, is what causes our apathy. It has affected our population. It has even affected Discordians. We have become (to borrow a Sub Genius term) “Pinks”.
The rest of us have become jaded, cynical and hate filled. Which can be healthy. If you don’t believe me, then you should try it some time. It’s good for the mind, body and soul.
How do things work in Brasil? Do you have the same problems, or are your “normal people” still in love with Order and Stability?
Thus ends the first Epistle to the Brasilians.
~Payne
Ah! Such diversity! I think this “cultural exchange” between the Português speakers of Brasil, and the English speakers will yield a good harvest. I hope to see your works, and deeds. I hope to see you embrace and expand the Black Iron Prison. But most of all, I hope to see you do it with laughter in mind and a wicked gleam in your eye.
To step off the edge of the normal, the believable and the accepted is what makes me a Discordian. This article is one such step, but the second shall have to wait, I have mischief to get up to.
Peace!
~Payne
[The translation to portuguese here!]
[This post is a series of questions made up by some friends. We're supposed to answer it in our personal websites (such as blogs or flogs) and then pass it on. You read it and then you know me better... A little]
Name: Peterson Roberto da Silva
Birthday: October 4
How old are you? 14 (nowadays 15)
Tattoo? No
Piercings? No
Music: any Evanescence’s song
Do you love anybody so much you’d cry for? Putting the verb in the present, no.
Have you ever broken any bone? No
Pepsi or Coca-cola? Cocaaaaa
A drink: orange juice
What names do you find beautiful? Paulo, Ana
What’s your underwear favorite color? oO [symbol that means something like what the fuck??]
Shoe’s number: 40 (the pattern in Brazil is different from those of other countries)
What kind of music do you like? Rock, Pop, Dance, a little bit of R&B and rap, and some other exceptions…
What is the subject of conversation you like less? Diseases
Favorite color: GREEN
How do you see yourself in the future? Happy; besides that, could be anything.
Do you have a girlfriend? No
Special friends: João, Aline, Natacha, Ana, Jyu, Jaque, Luiz Fernando, Juliana, Lucas, Leandro, ANDREAH, Priscilla, Carol, all of them without any order of preference
Favorite bands? Evanescence, Green Day, My Chemical Romance, Muse, Panic! At The Disco, Sex Pistols, Libertines, Fall Out Boy, Cansei de Ser Sexy [...]
What is the first thing you think about when you wake up? “I have classes today. Shit.”
Blonde hair, black hair or red hair? Brown hair fits into black category, riiiiight??
What interests you most on them [girls]? Is it recording?
If you could be any other person, who would you be? Fuck it, I can’t. But, hummm, If I could…
Favorite movie: Click, Kill Bill and Little Miss Sunshine
Favorite sport: About sports I’m good as a duck: It can walk, fly and swim, but it does it badly.
Shy or communicative? Oh, it depends. But most of the times communicative.
Hobbie: music and reading! YEEAH!
A sentence you say a lot: niiiiiiiiiice! (an extended version of “nice”)
What would you like to receive on birthday? A bookstore or a conscient humankind. A little more critic would be better already.
Passions? Family, friends, music and books
Sugar or salt? Yay, now you got me… I don’t know!
Do you think love can last forever? No. One day someone dies.
Conductor or conducted? Simple and direct.
Last place you screamed: Beto Carreiro, I guess [an amusement park]
What do you do when you’re upset? Usually listen to some sad songs on my headphones.
Friend that lives the further from you? Eduardo de Brida Alves, that son of a bitch never called me anymore!
Bed time? After tricks of mind, Tela Class, Fudêncio or anything else good on TV or internet.
Favorite event? Meetings with friends, when no job is done but we talk a lot…
3 Desires: happiness, freedom, and Xuxa getting old very badly…
Unfaithful on a relationship? Never was and never will be…
What was your worst mistake? Not being able to be another gear that accepts everything, wants whatever everybody wants, to end up like everybody does, doing everything to, in the end, create an illusion of happiness. Sorry, I cannot be that way.
What is friendship for you? A weird thing and infinite (until it ends) source of happiness
Are you addicted to something? Irritate Natacha xD
What was the best and worst day of your life? I think the worst was when I putted braces, and the best was Beto Carreiro’s ride.
Do you consider yourself jealous? Why should I? Pff… Being jealous can be fun, but when it is serious it’s not good.
What will you do on college? Philosophy or Social Sciences
Best quotation: “The world has been for a long time an asylum” - Nietzsche
[There were other quotations from Nietzsche, but I don't know exactly how they are in english]
By request of Aline.
–
Important: this post was written in the beginning of 2007 June. I have changed a lot.
Welcome to my english experience! Oh Eris, that’s gonna be awesome…